Basic Tips For The New Hobbiest 2

Over time, I have gathered information from a number of different places to put into one blog for both hobbiest and providers. I have also encountered some situations that need to be brought up. And so far, I haven’t found anywhere. So, this is just an assorted of “everything” and there not in any particular order.

Wise Words From A Hobbiest

Note: I wanted to share these tips that I found that come from an experienced hobbiest. I know there’s not much you can really find coming from your perspective of things. And I felt this important to put it up for ya’ll. At the bottom I have added some tips that I knew would also be helpful.

If you’re new to the hobby and you want to deal with escorts,  it would help if you… 

Tip 1: Determine a monthly budget. And stay within your budget.

Tip 2: Determine how much are you willing to spend per session? 

Tip 3: 3: GFE Monger Or Not??? Must you have GFE stuff in your session in order to have a good time? Because if you do need GFE, it will generally cost you more than non-gfe sessions. If you need that kind of stuff you’d better find out exactly what you need asap to save yourself time, money, trouble and frustration. Then look for escorts that do that type of stuff.

Tip 4: How Much Time Do You Need? 30 or 60 minutes? Can you do two pops within an hour? If not stick to 30 minute sessions.4

Tip 4 a: If you want to do 15 minute sessions I hope you can get a boner fast or there may be a problem. 

Tip 5: You MUST do your research!! (USA, & )Other mongers will tell you everything you need to know about a escort. If there are 2 or more reviews with guys saying the same things – you can normally count on the reviews being true. Good research will help you bypass going in blind and more likely than not – wasting your time and money.

Tip 5a: Don’t TOFTT! (Take One For The Team) Since you’re new, you should avoid taking one for the team. Only visit reviewed escorts and this will help you avoid wasting your time and money.

Tip 6: Rates? Note: Decent looking babes (in the DC-Balt area) now want at least $120/HH but you may be able to find a bunch of nice ones charging $100/HH – with good research. The babes that look better than most are going for like $150HH. 

Tip 7: No Rushing!! Don’t let escorts ever rush you -if its a 30 or 60 minute session. After you’re in the room with them simply say, we have ___  minutes right? And let them know that you expect to be there for most of the ___  minutes – and that will prevent them from rushing you.  

Tip 8: Nice Guys Finish First! Be nice to the ladies and it will be returned manyfold and in many ways

Tip 8a: Don’t be put off if the escort gets on the phone as soon as you’re done with her. If you’re done with her why get mad if she checks her phone etc? Let her make some money. Your girls will love you for not being a dick.  

9: Possible Start Of Sessions: A fun way to begin your sessions, … (Non-GFE encounters)…have the lady lay next to you in bed to warm things up. Put your arm around her and put her on your right hand side so she can play with jr while cuddling with you and getting comfortable and it will give you the feeling of laying in bed with your GF. LOL! Then… As soon as jr. is condom ready – have her put that thing on and get busy with the CBJ. 

Tip 10: You’re The Customer! Remember, escorts are there for you – absolutely not the other way around. You don’t have to perform for them in any way shape or form.  Find out what you like and make sure you’re having your fun – your way!  You should also, take charge of every session or at least don’t let the escort direct you into stuff you really don’t want to do.

Tip 11: Build Your Squad! 

To GFE or PSE: The Big Debate

While these two meaning are HIGHLY debated between Providers and Hobbyiest. With each thread that I’ve read about this. Seems like almost everyone has a different answer. But there is ONE thing that’s for certain: GFE DOES NOT MEAN BB EVER!!!!

One Word: SAFETY!!!!! This should NEVER be compromised!!! The safety of you, the providers as well as your wife and signficant others safety. This is not only dangerous, but totally irresponisble as well as disrespectful to the ones in your real lives. I’m not here to tear up marriages and relationships, I’m here to help them!!!!

(Now that I got that out my system lol) When I went to my trusty ole googling companion lol to look up what meanings would come up. Wikipedia was at the top of list with this:

” GFE is a common term for a sexual encounter in which both the sex worker and the client are willing to engage in reciprocal sexual pleasure and some degree of emotional intimacy. A “girlfriend experience” generally involves more personal interaction than a traditional call girl or escort offers. There is a focus on not just having sex, but also having more of a comprehensive experience. The details vary widely from person to person. In the field of sex work, sex workers impart a sense of authenticity in order to make the experience more pleasurable for their customer, as well as to make the outcome more lucrative for themselves.

Okay, so I got curious and well I wanted to make sure I gave what I found on PSE. To be right about it all. Unfortunately, Wikidpedia didn’t have anything. So, this is what I found from urbandictionary

Porn Star Experience. A term used to describe a sexual encouter where the partner exibited certain porn-like characteristics. Usually including such things as: Talking Dirty,CIM (cum in mouth), a general knowledge of sexual positions and willingness to sexually please.”

Ok, so to put it in regular terms, depending on what’s important for you in what your looking for…are you wanting and needing just to get a nut, or you want a little more than that? I mean really, that’s what it comes down to. PSE is that hard grudge fuck with no cuddling or just laying there chilling afterwards. Where GFE you chilling laying there relaxing, enjoying the moment. (Me, personally, I’m both. Give me that hard grudge fuck, and let’s enjoy the moment of euphoria and just chill..why rush to get back into your reality??)

About Reviews

Knowing that reviews play an important role in screening the providers that your interested in seeing. Here’s a few things to consider. First off, it’s important to take notice of the site’s “rapport” (reputation) in reviews. I notice that in the few months time that I couldn’t get into my Erotic Monkey account. That the site just went downhill. BAD! Though they never really had a good reputation when it comes to reviews. Also, Adultlook has also gone downhill within the last 6 months are so. And is the very reason why i refuse to pay their ungoldly prices in their premiums packages anymore. On my end, I haven’t been getting “QUAILTY” customer base from Adultlook. This normally would mean that the percentage of having more fake reviews than not, goes up greatly.

Private Delights is a very reputable site to look at reviews, because the providers are able to comment on the review. And by the provider’s comments, either confirming the date went well or however or if she is contesting the review. Making the process of you trying to decipher the fake reviews and the real one much easier for you.

I’m gonna mention OurHome2, but am hesitant in doing so, because providers do not have the ability to see what written about them. Therefore, you can’t judge on what’s actually real and not. That’s just my take on it anyways.

Here it is on about looking at the reviews….consistency is important, if your seeing a consistacy is a provider’s reviews, and then you see one review that’s “off” that’s a tail tell sign that it’s probably a fake review.

The “Impulsive Buy”

Well, we all know that when we go to any store and impulsively buy items that were not on our grocery list, what that will lead up to. Spending way to much, on little of nothing, And not stretching our money to make it last. It’s definitely NOT the “smart buy” The same holds true with this situation. When it’s 2 AM, and you got a raging hard on, going thru escort ads and just start randomly calling around. This is NOT smart, but could lead up to getting into more shit than what you bargined for.

Suggestion: If this is you at 2 am, stick to the porn, this will only led you to be more frustrasted in the end than what you started with, AND will get you blacklisted. Whether it’s your email or phone number. I know that men are impulsive by nature, but this situation, plain and simple. Golden Rule: This is NOT the situation to be impulsive. Play it smart, not stupid.

“Window Shopping” Will Give You A Bad Name

If you’re going to “window shop” make sure to do so BEFORE contacting any provider. If you are a new hobbiest and don’t know any better. This is very important for you to know. It does NOT look good on you if you have contacted several providers to see which one will get back with you first. This does NOTHING but earn your way, very quickly, I should add in there, right into that blacklist. If you plan to continue having fun, this is not good practice. And It’s just wrong to do that to any provider. This is why it’s important to do your “window shopping” AND research BEFORE you contact any provider. Know what you want.

Yes, You ARE The Customer….

…”The customer is ALWAYS right” isn’t so true in this case scenerio. With the reason being, most don’t really understand or full know the laws. You have to knowledgeable in all these laws, and on top of them, being that they are forever changing. The reason why I bring this up. Is because so many are trying to tell us how to run to run our businesses. I’m gonna say, If you’re the customer, please stay on the customer side of things, and let us worry about our businesses please. And Enjoy being the customer, being spoilt during that time frame.

You May Be Looking For MSOG, But What You Get Is One Shot….

One chance, that’s all, to make a good impression. As Providers, we deal with assholes all day long, every day. We deal with haters all the time within our lives, just because sex work is looked down on and not understood. So we automatically, or at least I do, shut you off and out, the second you show any disrespect. So please read a providers website first, contact them on their preferred medium, and then introduce yourself warmly (with references, if required). The better impression you make, the higher the chance you’ll connect!

When Going To An Incall

When you are going to an incall, you should google earth the location and listen to the escorts directions explictly. There’s a reason why she is telling you those exact directions like she is. If you are taking an Uber or a Lyft. Please remember to let her know. There may be certain situations like a private home being her incall, where that might not be a cool thing to do. Also, It’s always good to be aware of your surroundings. Arrive 5 or 10 mins early, drive around the parking lot, is there anything around that you may see that might indicate something being “off”??? Always go with your gut. It’s better to safe than sorry. Speaking from experience, I had someone that got spooked out about my neighbor smoking a cigeretter outside, and took off….I couldn’t say anything, I was upset, but he did what he felt to be right. So NO matter listen to your gut!

Now I KNOW that I need to point out here, when I stated to arrive a few minutes early to check and make sure of your surroundings…that did NOT mean to arrive 30 minutes early, and expect to be seen then, NOR did I mean to sit in the parking lot or whatever looking all crazy and stupid, playing duck duck goose…Eventually you’ll end up getting “goosed” and causing trouble that way. That’s NOT what I meant, My exact meaning is to arrive a couple of minutes early just long enough so that YOU know YOUR surroundings, just as EVERYONE SHOULD BE DOING THIS ALREADY.

About Outcalls

I can tell you from expereince. Back when I was 25, 22 years ago, when I did outcalls, it’s pretty dangerous. This situation, it is more than likely compared to an incall, where a provider can walk into a sting or bust of some kind. I KNOW….from 22 years ago. So, it’s already hectic for a provider, and more than likely her nerves are gonna be on edge as it is anyway. Because just like you don’t know what your walking into going to incalls, a provider doesnt know what she is walking into going to outcalls. So please be mindful of that, and don’t have anyone else there that she doesnt know about. Don’t have any hidden cameras around. And things like this. Because you have no idea what we REALLY go through. And yes all these kinds of things they DO happen to us girls. Be mindful and respectful about all of this.

Etiquette on References

When a provider is requiring references or if you are offering references to another provider, and don’t know exactly what information to leave. It’s always best to give the provider as much information as you can. Here’s what would be very helpful to us.

  • Provider’s Name
  • Provider’s Website (if she has one)
  • Provider’s perferred Contact Method
  • Date or at least an estimate date when you saw the provider
  • And any details that may be helpful in remembering your encounter with her. Could be something ya’ll may have talked about or whatever

Please be mindful, I know that you are going to remember every detail of ya’lls date. And your supposed to! But for a provider, at least for me. it’s very embarrassing for me to try to remember things or who a person is and I can’t. It’s not to lessen the encounter at all. But there’s always so much going on, and that we are responisble for doing that alot of times, it’s just hard for us to recall the person or encounter.

How To Be Discreet When Leaving Tips

I have to say, it’s been very interesting to see the creativity that ya’ll are coming up with when leaving tips. And I honestly enjoy seeing this in ya’ll. It’s awesome, it really is. This past weekend someone who is new was faced wtih not knowing what to do if he wanted to leave a tip. And didnt know how to bring it up. Because i’m very adament on not speaking on things that shouldntbe, by law, shouldnt be discussed. And I know that this makes it so much harder for ya’ll, but really it makes it hard for everyone. So, if you find yourself wanting to leave a tip, I would say excuse yourself to the bathroom maybe, take care of it in there. Leave it on counter or the sink, like maybe under the mouthwash or something that may be in there. That is noticeable when she goes in there that she can see. And kinda say something to her, let her know. Especially traveling ladies and ones that change their incalls often. Just kindly mention to her, something like “Left ya a suprise in the bathroom” or you know just whatever, but let her know. in a small way to go make sure and look.

I want to add here, theres been reports of someone leaving cut up pieces of paper in the envelopes for the donations, also reports monopoly money and just all kinds of other creative ways that men have come up with to mess over a provider. I wanted to make aware just because theres much more that happens that you couldnt, hell you can’t even make this kind of shit up lol…so just be mindful, is all.

Hobby Vs Business

Ok, so with this never ending “debate” that’s not even a debate at all. I’m gonna take the time right now to make some things VERY CLEAR. Being that I am in the process of doing all of this as I’m typing 9-16-19 8:38 Am this will probably end up a blog on it’s own. Because I’ve gotten pretty damn tired of the “bullshit” about running a business and people who just don’t think that at 7 am on a monday morning, that im just twiddling my thumbs….up my cunt…bored…NOOOOOOO BY FAR AM I BORED!!!! One person hits me up at 6:30 this morning, Ok, so I’ve walked away for a minute. Cuz I got really pissed. Had to clear my head so that I can write correctly. Yes will be a blog and I will be taking out of everything that HAS TO BE DONE ON A MONDAY FOR ME AND MY BUSINESS. IM GONNA SET ASIDE THEREFORE MAKING ME BEHIND ANOTHER WEEK, CUZ EVERY DAY THAT I SPEND EXPLAINING SHIT TO PEOPLE THAT I REALLY DO NOT NEED EXPLAINING MY BUSINESS TO, IT PUTS ME BEHIND ON MY BUSINESS BY A WEEK WITH EVERY DAY THAT GETS WASTED!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHY DO YOU THINK IM SO BEHIND NOW????

ohh wait a minute, great example coming right now:

PS im leaving the above paragraph…cuz yes i was mad as all get out yesterday….you’ll see why soon

Your In A Bowling League As A “Hobby” In RL,…

So, here’s a few things I would like you to think about, and seriously put yourselves in these postions

Would you wake up the owner to the bowling alley at 6:30 in the morning…just to be friendly????

would you call the business owner before opening time and expect him to open BEFORE business hours???

Would you just decide not to show up and not find someone to be in your place???

Would you shortchange the cashier after getting your coke or beer at the bowling alley???

Would you not pay any dues thats owed for being in the league???

Would you haggle the rates that business owner has put to rent the shoes or that lane for that amount of time????

Would you tell the business owner their rates are too damn high??? or would you just look for anothe bowling alley to go bowling????

Would you tell that owner how to run his bowling alley business when you don’t have a clue yourself of to run the business of a bowling alley?????

Would you cross boundaries with that bowling alley owner or his employees, and ask personal questions about their lives???

Let me guess, you’ve answered no to all of these questions right????

well…..why not??? this is your “hobby” right??????

Would you appreciate any of this being done if you owned a business?

Point is, I don’t see where the difference is, and why this continues to happen, why do it because you seem in your mind, to justify mistreating us, cuz in your mind we’re just whores?????? is this the only reason that you treat a human being like worse than dog shit and disrespect the fuck out of them???? see what i’m talking about, there is no excuse nor justification in treating a provider any different than anyone else.

It May Be Your Hobby But It’s Someone’s Business

See, I’m in the process right now of incorporating myself. So, I’m literally taken the exact same steps of all the paperwork and everything than any other business owner goes through to start his or her business. My paperwork has to be in public records and all, I have to have a tax ID Number, the whole nine yards. If you wouldn’t treat any other business in these ways, then why would you treat a providers business in the ways that our businesses are being treated? It may be your hobby but simply said: please be mindful and respect that it’s someone’s business and that the bills that come with the business, they all need to be paid in order to give you, the customer all that you are wanting.

Robot or Human???

I know it can be hard to forget that we as providers are actually humans instead of just a fantasy in your mind. I can get that. But you really have to think about this. WE AER HUMANS, WE ARE PEOPLE, WE HAVE FEELINGS JUST LIKE YOU DO. We have families, We have our own appts we have to go to, we have boyfriends and husbands, we have ………And especially for me, becoming a provider, it’s instant “stardom” for lack of better words. To be expected to in the social “limelight” every day all the time when all you wanna do is curl up and just be quiet and be left alone. The only way I can really get across what I’m trying to is to give you an example:

To yesterday for example: me deactivating twitter has now become my “off” switch, cause I can’t control the Dm’s or anything, when I deactivated twitter yesterday, I get an email with the subject titled “twitter emergancy”….see this is where im gonna say…why so damn drastic???…no it wasnt …..i cant think of any emergancy that i would have from twitter….no…maybe i dont want to talk or be socialable that day, or the fact that im dealing with knowing my child is stalking me at 17 but cant prove it, or that im looking for a more perm place to live or the fact that i may be on the phone dealing with alll this business that I’m dealing with with doing this corporation….or just maybe….i just wanna be quiet…orrrr that i need time … my own time….to heal from what all i have gone through in this year alone……we may be going through alot of things that we may need to or want to keep to ourselves so this is why we ask to please respect our times that we for business and respect that we also have lives.

Understanding What Social Media Is Used For

Social media is a tool that is part everyone’s business now a days. And is a very good tool to use. Where you can find the information needed, See that a person is real or fake or what you may like in that person. But because of what I’m going through right now, I want to make sure that you are aware of this. Social Media is also a very tool for all the predators out there that like to target sex workers. For us, like for example, traveling ladies, its a good way for you to know when you she is going to be in your town. But it’s also a good way for a stalker to know exactly where she is. This is a horrific thing to go through. I can not describe how alignated i feel right now because of this situation. ok…So theres good and bad and the horrific that come with this social media and this job.

We Are NOT Replacements For Health Care

Yes we are here to help you in your lives. We are here to listen, when you have no one to listen to you. We are here when everything may look bleak in your lives, and you may be thinking the worst, and you turn to a provider and she may help in ways that none of us will truly know or even understand. It is important for everyone to understand that we are NOT health care professionals. If you should be going for mental health. please don’t stop or not go cause you feel that we can help you in this way. This thought process is not recommended and can be dangerous for you…and for us as well.

How To Deal With Being Nervous

Yes, there is A WHOLE LOT that is going through your mind when you are at the point of actually meeting a provider for the first time. And all the circumstances that are involved. And You have every right to be nervous. But I want to share with everyone what I tell someone that’s “new” that maybe can help just a little bit with the nervous part. To look at things the way I KNOW that you are lol…yes of course your gonna be nervous. Change your thought process ok…Take me for example….your just coming to meet with a friend…and well, just so happens that the friend you are meeting with just can’t seem to help herself, and just HAS TO HAVE something to suck on….lmao So changing the way you think, can help. When you are thinking about the legailities its gonna make you more nervous. But changing your thoughts, will not only help with the nerves but you will also, not “act” like your doing something wrong. Your just meeting a friend, no more…just a friend. Thinking this way and planting a damn good kiss on me when you walk in the door…well…..that usually melts it all away and then it’s not even thought in your mind. 🙂

On Male Performance

While I just spoke about being nervous, and understanding that nerves can lead to peformance issues. This is why I explained the above. Also if you haven’t done anything for awhile or you may be worried about lasting. I normally will suggest maybe taking matters “in your hands” a few hours or so before you meet with a provider. If this is a major concern for you. I wouldn’t suggest doing that, like right before you the time when your supposed to meet. Cause then you just might have that issue. And this is honestly for any situation really. Letting go and releasing some of the pressure beforehand can help aid in being able to last longer. Now this also does NOT mean to take care of it like 3 to 5 times before you meet with a woman, and then you like kill her in the process of trying to again lol

Your Screening Information, Privacy And The Law

Having an understanding of all the laws that are specifically for the adult industry, and that you can’t just hire a regular attorney if you are in the adult industry. That you have to to hire a “porn law” attroney for anything to do with the adult industry. Being that there’s specifc laws that are only for this industry that a regular attorney would not be aware of. This is major ok. Also you need to understand that for the providers that have websites….the laws on data and your privacy are STRICT! That we have to have “PURPOSE” on the data is collected when visiting any website…and that by law we have STATE THE LENGTH OF TIME WE KEEP THAT DATA, WE HAVE TO EXPLAIN WHAT SECURITY MEASURES THAT IS TAKEN IN ORDER TO SECURE THE DATA” This is LAW!!!!! We as providers MUST FOLLOW!!!! First of all, you need to know that having a website, THAT IS AN INVESTMENT IN ITSELF…ok…(especially if youve gone thrugh FIVE websites in one year like i have lol) to have a website and to make sure it’s per being legal to be up and running, that we are bound by law on all of this. So for you to have an understanding that your privacy and your information is really BOUND BY LAW. ok I hope this helps.

My Ending Statement

There were just a couple more things that i wanted to bring up and shed some light on but i wanted to go ahead and get this out. i might write a blog on the last two things that i was gonna bring up. But all in all, i hope that this may help yall out some and maybe to shed a little light on some things. i don’t know if anyone can tell or not, but i honestly do think, i guess i dont know how to put it, but i think more along the lines of a man, and i can put myself in alot of situations and thoughts alot of the times, and i get it i really i can see where yall are coming from…. but i try to give both perspectives and break it down for everyone so that maybe you can have more like a full vision…or understanding maybe, none of this is meant in a bad way…im trying to help everyone to see the different sides of everything so im hoping that part 2 of the basic can shed that light for you.

,Much love


9-17-19 10:31 PM

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