In today’s world that we live in, “hook ups” are the “in thing.” Dating is right at, just about being non existant these days. So much so, it seems like that no one really has any clue what “dating” really is. I think that may be that might be the reason why it’s so hard to be able to understand the concept between the dating and prostitution and knowing where that fine line between legal and illegal is drawn in the sand.
Dating …The concept of what dating means can drastically change depending on graphic area, time period, culture class, age as well as belief systems. Take for example, the difference of what daing means to me and what this may mean to someone that’s starting to date in todays society spans over a 30 year period time frame. My first “date” was when I was 14. I’m now 48. For me, this meant ACTUALLY …well, hmm…MAYBE lol… going to see a movie…ummm maybe….or at least telling my mom that’s what I was doing ..or actually going to the movies and leaving half way through it, especially if it was a bad movie…and going to the park getting drunk on a half can of Busch beer ( ok yeaa i admit, a TOTAL cheap date back then lmao) and having sex on the hood of the car…and afterwards realizing your stuck in the mud and you’re gonna be late for curfew…all of which you just KNOW that you are now getting your ass KICKED!!! lmfao!! …is VERY VERY DIFFERENT to what today’s dating means. Which is called “a hook up”…
Hook ups are simply just getting laid, getting your groove on to get release. And that consist of is just finding someone…anyone to get that release. Most often that’s strangers. Which hey I’m not knocking, that can be a whole lot of fun. Like when you dancing and having fun in the club, and decide you wanna get you some outside the bar. Yeaaa that’s fun, exciting, exhilarating, and taking the chance of getting caught outside is a high all on it’s own. Where just hooking up with someone, it’s just straight sex and your gone..Again that’s fine…to a point. There’s no connections with someone. Which is another difference between when I started dating and today’s dating.
Having an imtimate connection. Today’s “dating” scene of just “hooking up” with just someone just to get laid with no imitacy of any kind is one of the top main contributing factors that has caused “the loneliness epedemic” or “the lonely generation” right along side of social media.
The same study also shows a correlation between the number of casual sex partners and the levels of loneliness and depressive symptoms, more hookups often leads to higher feelings of depression and loneliness. It also takes a toll on a person’s self esteem.
if someone isn’t careful, it can lead to loneliness, depression, regret and be used as a coping mechanism to avoid finding a genuine connection with another human…. self esteem and mental health if engaging hookup culture is actually going to be detrimental to them.
Looking back, I feel like dating was more fun then. Got out and did things and got my groove on plenty back then, and in a whole lot of different fun places, in between everything. there was some kind of connection didn’t have to be all that serious. It was just a connection on whatever level..and then ya gotta add in there, all the sneaking around. Which of course, always seems to be more fun sneaking around lol…Now a days, it’s just flat out, sex..
So in today’s world of the “hook up” dating culture, what is it that makes the difference between legal and illegal? Well, let’s go over a couple of scenarios kinda quickly. Which would better help you to understand the differnces.
Scenario 1: So, we are gonna have up a night out. You pick me up and you take me to dinner, we having great conversation, laughing and cutting up, enjoying some wine together and have a great meal. Eveything just seems to be flowing very easily, it just seems to be all happenin perfectly. (Of course me being a cheap date, it didn’t take much wine lol…Ok i couldn’t help it, I had to add that in, it fit lol), We are going in the direction of my place to bring me back home, right. And well, knowing me, it’s bluntly just gonna be road head okayyy.. i mean yea, im evil like that lmao…So we continue on INSIDE…and we have a TOTAL BLAST, yes pun intended…quite a few blast ok..
So through out the evening during all of our conversations of just life in general, talking about lay offs and job issues and whatever, so you know im about $100 short for my rent. And it’s honestly not even really mentioned, it was simply nothing but “passing conversation” ok…
So we’ve had us a grand ole time ok…and well it’s getting late, you need to go home for rest before work..and while getting dressed either one of two things, your either surprise me and don’t say anything just wanna surprise me or you look at me and say hey, ya know i wanna help you out on your rent this month, Here’s the $100 that you’re short, don’t worry about anymore ok. And of course me, im gonna start crying…Thank you, i say…and that’s it, we kiss goodbye and your gone.
Scenario 2: Instead of going out, we decide to stay in, we might watch some movies…hmm…well… who said they had to be G…PG …or even R rated? lmao, wellll..lol We may have a cup of coffee or maybe even tea. or not even that much..simply just handing out shooting the shit together, on the couch or whatever, hell i might be folding some clothes at some point ok lol…
…and well, knowing me…it’s just seems, well i dont know i cant ..I can’t help it, I admit that I have a problem,I know I’ma dick addict…ok I do know this already…and I admitted this a looong time ago ok…it’s NOT new news…just gotta have a dick in my mouth ….(im dieing laughing here) and i know yall are to…but sha…yea…dese be very true scenerios yea…uhh and yea even the stories up top lol and well…i can’t explain it…i mean it’s… well, it’s kinda like the situation ya get into when your driving down the road, and ALL OF A SUDDEN, the fucking tree just decides at that ONE FUCKING PARTICULAR TIME….to just wants to be in the middle of the road and and it was…wellll…. ..”I promse officer it was the tree’s fault” …yeaaa ….that kinda thang…i mean the shit just always happens…im sucking dick okayy…lol
ok so to end, it’s goes the same way as above, the end of the date and you helping me out with my rent..
You get a phone number from a friend that recommended someone to you, or even, i mean let’s go there, either Tinder ( I dont have) or an escort site…..you call, text or email
“Available” or you may say…”Pics”
Ok so I’d like to ask you, what’s different about this and the other two scenario’s? How did that feel to you? How does that come across to you? When compared to the first two scenario’s…what’s there? Or actually, better yet, what’s NOT there?
Now, when I was trying to put my thoughts together with what words I was going to use for both this scenario and the second one. And when I had figured out my words for the second scenario, I was speaking these words out loud, ok. When I went from ending the second scenario and then I spoke the word “available” out loud,….I FELT IT…I GOT IT…(remember, I’m an empath, I FEEL it ok). It hit like a ton a bricks for me, but I FINALLY got it. I wonder can anyone else feel it or even guess?
This is what I literally felt when I said out loud “available,” Cold, disconnected, a wall, no feelings, the word “mono” comes to mind, just blane, just there, empty….nothing there, basically just dead…and i didnt want to use that word, but I have to because that’s what I felt from it. It’s all finally realized for me. With the studies of this generation, I have even found myself to be included in this “lonely epidemic.” I don’t have ANY ONE, NO ONE..very literally…no friends, that’s in person, I have a couple, but I dont see often at all, I don’t talk to them often at all either. I’m very cut off from the world, So I when I felt these things, I had to be honest with myself about all this.
And this is when it got a whole deeper for me. I realized a couple more things. This disconnection…You don’t even realize it. Why? well, simply, your disconnected, don’t feel it, don’t know it. Have absolutely no clue about it! How could you, right? Which led me to realize that this would be the reason for the all the dick pics…Yea that hit home for me…We are so disconnected as a whole, and especially for a man. The only connection a man feels in this epidemic is through his sexual organs. And I want to explain, for a woman it’s different. Because of the simple fact that we are mothers, there are hormones that keep us connected for the reason of having children. And that’s where the huge difference lies between the connections between the male and the female. The realization of all this really hit me hard ok. It was definitely a huge “WOW” for me.
One more HUGE realization hit me. And this came from a conversation off of Reddit the other night. I was answering some questions someone about the legailities. And I explained it all, And it’s acutally fairly simple. but someone had come back with the comment, “I guess I’ll have to bring a lawyer with me next time huh”. Now when this hit, I was like “HOLYYYY SHIT!” Men are sooo disconnected in this “lonely epidemic” that when it comes to a woman and anything that a woman may say…..there’s so much of a wall and such a disconnection, simply said, a woman’s voice…is non existant. It’s almost like an invisible barrier, that the voice doesn’t even reach to you at all.
Because see, I couldn’t understand why a man would want to go spend extra money that is NOT needed at all to go spend, to hire an attorney, just to hear the same thing that we women providers tell you that is fact and truthful and constantly repeat to ya’ll. DON’T TALK ANY MONEY AND SEX…..And no matter what you men would rather spend that money so you can have “validated” instead of keeping that money…and simply looking at exactly what I have put in front of you, the pages to the laws, and I have broken it down for you, explaining it all to you….instead of keeping that money and having fun with a provider or whatever with it. That was major for me to realize. I wanted to make sure that I brought this up and explained this, because just like me, I know it’s not realized.
Going Over The Differences
Two things that’s very different between the first and second scenario and the third.
- THE EMPHASIS PUT ON MONEY!!! ….oh let me add in here..
- THE EMPHASIS PUT ON “DOING SOMETHING WRONG”
Now I want to break this down for you.
INTENT: Intent when we are talking law, for example, Intent to Distribute, whether it’s dope, it;s alcohol to a minor, or any other law, WHEN YOU SHOW …SHOW …INTENT OR “THE PRETENSES OF” (Just like meeting up for coffee)….SHOWING AND HAVING INTENT MAKES ILLEGAL. Let me make sure to say in here, that “intent” is important in both the law….and in life in general. But we are talking law here…
PUTTING EMPHASIS ON MONEY: Here’s how I’m going to explain this one…
Every time i start talking with someone outside work, I’m in conversation with them. We are just sitting here bullshitting, talking about being busy with our jobs right. and i mention “yea I stay busy all the time with my website” …and of course the question will be “so what’s your website?” ….Now here it is, I’m gonna tell ya, I’m pretty fucking proud of this motherfucking site, ok…I learned how to do ALL OF THIS ALLL ON MY FUCKING OWN!!! I barely knew how to turn on a computer when I started making my sites. so yeaaa…im proud of it. And I tell that person, “Now look, I’ll give you the site, let me know what ya think about it, i made that all by myself, give me an outsiders opinion, i want to know what you think about it, sooo when you see it, it’s NOT about THAT”
That person comes back to me and says “well, i dont want it to be about money” RIGHT OFF THE BAT! ummm…in my head, didnt i just say “It’s NOT about THAT” First off, I’d like to point out, now that I realize it, that’s part of that disconnection, my voice not getting through that barrier for him to hear what I said…and secondly…YOU JUST MADE IT ABOUT MONEY!!!
There’s so many of you and soooo many times THE VERY FIRST THING OUT OF MAN’S MOUTH IS ” I DONT WANT IT TO BE ABOUT MONEY” ….YOU JUST FUCKING MADE IT ABOUT MONEY!!! YOU PUT EMPHASIS ON MONEY AND MADE IT ABOUT MONEY WITHOUT REALIZING WHAT EXACTLY YOU DID!!!
So, the differences in the first three scenerio’s is, the first two were about “the date” and NOT the money!!! The third scenerio, well, would you answer and unknown stranger without getting a name or anything when that fine of legal and illegal is blurred and YOU KNOW THAT THE WAY THE LAWS ARE NOW WRITTEN CHANGING THINGS FROM A MISDEMENOR TO RACKING UP YEARS OF FELONY HUMAN TRAFFICKING CHARGES????….I would hope not!!!! So let me ask you, why do you expect us to answer some unknown when we are aware of these very fine lines between illegal and legal???? Not only that, I would like to point out to you, saying “available” and “pics” .…is just soooooo ….YUUUUCKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! EWWWW FUCKING RUDE….okkayyyyy It’s fucking such a turn off, I’m sorry ya’ll, but THAT does NOT make my cunt wet at all, much less me stopping what i’m doing to answer something like that okayyy…FER REALLLL lol
When you make it about the money, mentioning the money, asking about the money, ….I’ve noticed, on Reddit, there are soo many of you that are wanting to know the right way to approach an escort….what I’ve noticed is there’s sooo much concern about the money….seems like you may be forgetting whatever personal reasons that may have brought you this far…tend to forget the REAL “personal” reason(s) you’ve come to this point of asking about seeing an escort. Then all of sudden….you’ve lost “that connection” see what i’m trying to say here…ill go farther with this in a minute.
Putting Emphasis on “doing something wrong:” Ok so I get it, it’s only natural to be nervous anytime a guy goes to have a date with a girl, I get that part, more than you realize, ON TOP OF THAT….IT’S COMPOUNDED BY THE FACT THAT’S IT’S WITH SOMEONE YOU’VE BEEN FANTASIZING ABOUT FOR QUIET A WHILE NOW…ANNNNND THEEEEN..ON TOP OF BOTH ….IT’S TRIPLED BY ALL THE LEGALITIES….MAKES IT EVEN WORSE..I get it.
But here’s a secret, thinking that you are REALLY up to no good…guess what happens??? YOU ARE GOING TO “ACT” LIKE YOUR DOING NO GOOD!!! STAIGHT UP, THIS HOW WIVES AND MOMS KNOW YOU ARE UP TO NO GOOD!!!!!1 YOU SHOW IT!!! LOL BECAUSE IT’S TAKEN OVER YOUR MIND, …then what happens…YOU END UP FUCKING UP!!! Without you even realizing what you’ve done, you being all that nervous…LIKE “THAT” Your putting off vibes, the wrong kind of vibes. Your up tight, you don’t get to enjoy the experience as much if at all, because your nervous about it being something wrong. The nervousness itself, times THREE, your body, your mind, your whole being changes and you don’t even know it. This sends off signals that you’re up to no good, and anyone can pick it up..cause now you’re paranoid, the whole nine yards…if you stop and realize the stages that you go through when you are nervous, you can pretty much figure out there’s a cycle to what your body is saying …as well as doing in that nervous state….Not to mention, any male being nervous…well we are aware of what that means, things don’t work quite as well…
The less empasis you put of it “being something wrong” .…and the more empasis on “going on a date” makes things easier and doesnt send your body into fucking nerve wracking oblivion and then you dont send off “body signals” that you are doing something wrong…
Let’s Talk “Connection” and “Disconnection”
Ok, so I know A LOT of you use “the money” to define your “boundaries” within your own selves. And I’ve heard this so many times, ok. It’s like me for example, I don’t do greek for that same reason. That to me is my brain understanding the differences in personal and non personal. It’s simply a brain mechanism to help you identiy between the two. Like I said, I DO get it! Using the money to differenate between the two disconnects you more so than is realized.
Going back up a few paragraphs to when I mentioned about the connection and forgetting the real reasons that brought you to this step...For most of you, and yes no lie…FOR ME….HUMAN CONTACT!!! HUMAN CONTACT FOR HUMANS IS A NEED, IT’S SUPPOSED TO BE A NEED. If you are not getting enough HUMAN CONTACT, like say for example…ME…you lose touch with yourself, you lose touch with all things actually, come to think about it…WE ALL NEED TO HAVE HUMAN CONNECTION. it’s natural. putting emphasis on it being wrong or on the money or whatever, the need of what brought you here to this point….it gets lost, forgotten, it gets tangled then it starts to blur and then in the end…you find you’re still empty ….
Let me explain…ANY CONNECTION ESPECIALLY when we are in the “lonely generation” IS A CONNECTION!!! IT CAN BE THE SMALLEST OF THINGS, IT DOESNT HAVE TO BE A HUGE CONNECTION THAT ENDS UP BEING “HIGH MAINTANCED” Understanding that introducing yourselves “properly” as “we” say…that, that is the very beginning of a small connection, and I mean, in a world that is sooooo disconnected, the brain, mind, spirit, body all of it, every part of us, is literally starving for it…but yet we have become so disconnected that we get scared to connect AT ALL…even in the smallest of little gestures…that leaves us continually to be empty
Making It About “The Date”
Lastly….when a girl is getting dressed for a date..a legal date…she puts A WHOLE LOT OF TIME AND EFFORT INTO THAT DATE….She takes her time getting dressed, making sure her legs and all are shaved, her make up is right….her hair is perfect…and if it’s not PERFECT….she’ll redo her hair!!!! I promise you lol…and nine times out of ten…SHE IS GOING CHANGE 50, 000 TIMES BEFORE SHE’S FEELING OK WITH WHAT SHE’S GOT ON FOR YOU….YES VERY TRUE!
Providers do the same thing…but EVEN MORE SO….making sure that you receive what you are coming to us for, risking yourselves for, because apparently that need or desire has overcame that risk ok….WE ARE AWARE OF THESE FACTS…WE GO UP AND OUT OF WAYS AND TAKE A WHOLE LOT OF TIME TO MAKE SURE…THINGS ARE PERFECT FOR YOU.
Both scenario’s…are NOOOO different with the exception, that we take extra care of the details of your time with us….HERE IT IS…IN REALITY…..IT’S NOOOO DIFFERENT….
for you men…YOU PUSH IT TO MAKE IT DIFFERNT!!! Do I need to say that again????? because you have your minds SET on that money, putting the empasis on that money...YOU MAKE IT DIFFERNT, JUST BECAUSE ONES PROFESSIONAL AND ONE IS NOT…
Well let me ask, just because “I” date professionally…when I don’t go no where, i don’t talk to anyone, i am very alienalted from the world, and i’m starving for that human connection…and it’s very important to me to have a few “new friends” over for a little while…so that i can connect with the world…what’s any different…the fact you are paying for it????
nooooo that’s YOU PUTTING IT YOUR OWN HEADS THAT IT’S ABOUT THAT…FOR ME????? IT’S ABOUT HAVING HUMAN CONNECTION…YOU AGAIN MADE IT ABOUT MONEY, ….THEREFORE …MADE IT ILLEGAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Simply Fucking Put…
WHEN YOU TAKE OUT THOSE THREE EQUATIONS..INTENT, EMPASIS ON MONEY, EMPHASIS ON DOING SOMETHING WRONG,
YOU HAVE WHAT’S CALLED A REGULAR DATE..
BY PUTTING THOSE THREE EQUATIONS INTO THIS MIX ….MAKES IT TOTALLY ILLEGAL!!!
FOR ME…IT’S ABOUT MEETING NEW FRIENDS…HAVING HUMAN CONTACT, CONNECTING, HAVING FUN…GOING OUT, TALKING WITH A HUMAN INSTEAD OF THIS FUCKING BOX I’VE GOTTEN TO WHERE I CAN’T STAND…FOR ME…IT’S A DATE…BECAUSE WHEN YOU MEET ME…WHETHER YOUR MARRIED OR NOT…YOU HAVE A TRUE FRIEND..UNTIL YOU FUCK ME OVER ONCE…
WHY CAN‘T IT BE SIMPLY ABOUT MEETING A NEW FRIEND???? DONT WE DO THAT PRETTY MUCH IN OUR DAILY LIVES, …WELLL YALL DO…I DONT LOL…We meet new people every day…some we make friends with …some we don’t ….
********going on a date, or even staying in and watching a movie, sitting here with me for coffee, or tea or whatever and having sex….getting some hot sweaty groove one or even a straight out booty call, IS NOT ILLEGAL…WHEN YOU MAKE IT OBVIOUS, WITH YOUR INTENT, SHOWING YOUR NERVOUSNESS, AND MENTIONING MONEY AND MAKING IT ABOUT MONEY…..THAT’S THE VERY VERY VERY FUCKING FINE LINE BETWEEN A LEGAL DATE AND ILLEGAL PROSTITUTION….AND I TOLD YOU…THAT FINE LINE IS ALMOST NON EXISTANT THESE DAYS…*********
I hope like hell I have been able to break things down for all of you..i dont want to see anyone going down for anything that can simply NOT EVEN BE AN ISSUE!! IF YOU DON’T MAKE IT AN ISSUE!!!
Much love and licks
Rogue 3-21-2020 9:18 pm…
yall keep safe and well out there please!!!!